Oh No! There Has Been a GNOME GNAPPING!

This terrifying & rather shocking footage was found on a security camera in an undisclosed location. Twinkie wanders along after his morning crossword puzzle and coffee not bothering anyone.

There is no nice way to say this & nothing will make it less shocking...there has been a GNOME GNAPPING!

Will we ever see our beloved Twinkie again? What are we to do? Call the police? Hire a private investigator? Do we negotiate with his captors? Is it already too late?

The only thing that was left behind was this menacing note:

I Always Feel Like...Somebody's Watching Me!

So... Twinkie has been feeling a little odd all morning. Ever have that happen? Feel like you are being watched?

Is it me or does Twinkie look oblivious to you? He seems completely unaware, and folks, this does not look good...

If this is who I think it is, there could be some major trouble ahead, it looks like Twinkie's evil cousins are after him. Yes, Twinkie is one tough cookie, but he might not be a match for Seamus & Puff, the evil crime duo.

These two are scary & heartless gnomes. Seamus, the Steelers Gnome is known for his brute force, & Puff is the brains behind the brawn. Stay tuned...

Twinkie Gets a Blackberry Curve

Yes, folks, believe it. Twinkie McGnome has a Blackberry. "Why?" you ask; because he is a Gnome on the go. He is the Man of Resin. You know it and you should try to stop the jealousy.

Twinkie has places to go and people to see, and of course he has got to stay mobile so he can represent. Anyway, it was time for Twinkie to go modern, check e-mail and surf the web whenever and wherever he wants to. If you want to talk to him, he has given you his digits; otherwise, you are out of luck.

Is that a mocking I hear? Are you ripping on him because of his 3 fingers & a thumb? Are you challenging The Twinkster to a race on Google? Even with his walking stick and baseball, he is going to own you. Try and stop him; go ahead I dare you!

After Twinkie scored his amazing Blackberry, he decided to hang with some friends at their kitchen table (ok, ok ON their kitchen table) and have an ice cold Labatt, yeah, he lives the life you can only dream about. Must be nice, sorry it can't be you.

Peace & Love to you all... and remember people, don't hate on the gnome.

This here is Twinkie... that is Mr. Twinkie McGnome to you. Twinkie comes to America via a wonderful factory in China. Reports are that he has many brothers and sisters that will be sent for shortly.

Twinkie is not your average gnome. He won't be caught laying around in a flower bed. He has places to go and people to see. You never know where you will spot him, so watch your back. So far, Mr. McGnome appears friendly enough, but watch his eyes, people...he is watching YOU!

Twinkie made his debut appearance at the Fox Run Garlic Festival, where a magnificent time was had by all. He made the rounds and seemed to truly enjoy himself, although some onlookers appeared to be a bit nervous in his presence. Above, he skidattled up the fireplace and took a great picture with "the foxes".

Later on, Twinkie needed a rest after all of that tasting; he was found sleeping peacefully in the wine rack, and no one seemed to mind. Since there wasn't a Mets game going on, wine tasting and napping made for a perfect afternoon. Far be it from me to have you think for one minute that this was the end of Twinkie's time at the festival...

Twinkie went on to listen to the bands that were playing, sip some more wine and of course delight himself in much garlic fare. That is when it happened...after this folks, Mr. McGnome got just a bit out of hand, so we will leave our little story right here. Let it suffice to say, that by the time Twinkie and his entourage moved on, he was among an army and not just the two guards!

Twinkie has plans for another busy week, so stay tuned...